Anticipation

I remember doing this same thing in January of last year.  I packed our bags as if we were headed to Ethiopia, but had no idea whether we would actually be traveling soon or not.  We are at that place again.  If the interview goes well next Tuesday and the embassy is satisfied with the outcome, it could be only a matter of days before we are on our way to Ethiopia.  If the interview is not satisfactory, then it could be weeks or even months.  So here I sit in this place of hopeful anticipation trying to guard my heart, but knowing full well that if the news next week is not favorable, I will be a mess.  The good news is, I have been a mess on multiple occasions in the past and God has given me what I need to get through each and every circumstance.  I know He will not fail me this time.  

It has now been 66 days since I held my sweet little daughter in my arms.  I miss her and eagerly anticipate the day she will be in my arms again.  John and I have made the decision that he will travel alone to bring Addie home.  That is a hard one for me, but we feel it is the best thing for our family.  I am so thankful to have an amazing husband who not once, but TWICE, has stepped up and said that he will be happy to travel an untold amount of hours on an airplane with a one year old ALONE.  That was not our original plan with Sena, but that is how it worked out.  I am thankful that I was able to spend a week in Ethiopia with Sena before coming home.  When she and her Daddy arrived at the airport 10 days later, I wasn't a stranger to her.  This time, though, I won't be there to take Addie out of the orphanage for good and that makes me really sad.  I mean REALLY SAD.  But, she and her Daddy will have an amazing opportunity to bond and I am quite certain that they will get along just fine.  It is a little hard to think about their arrival at the airport and know that I won't be able to take her into my arms right away as I did with Sena because I will be a stranger to her.  My prayer is that God is preparing her heart even now for the love of her Daddy and Mommy and that it won't be too long before she is receptive to the love that I long to shower on her.  Soon, baby girl!  Praying we are all together SOON!