Oh my heart

You would think that the fifth time would not be that big of a deal.  Unfortunately, it seems to be a bigger deal than the others because I am quite certain it is the last time.  (Of course, I felt the same thing when Isaac was a baby and look where we are now.)  Addie has officially moved out of our bedroom into her own room and that makes this mama sad.  She has been napping in her room since she first came home, but, for attachment purposes, both girls were in our room at night for the first several months.  On Monday night, Addie slept in her room because we were traveling to Chicago early the following morning and wanted to get ready without waking her.  She did great, so we gave it another try the following night and she slept later than she ever has.  We did that for the rest of the week and John and I were both incredibly thankful to sleep until almost 8 am yesterday for the first time since Addie has been home. 

Tonight, I moved the crib out of our bedroom and now it seems rather final.  The memories of the last months came rushing back and I remembered our first night home with her.  She seemed like such a tiny little peanut.  She fell asleep in my arms - snug in her green footed jammies.  I placed her in her crib and she slept for a few hours.  When she woke up, we weren't sure what to do, so we brought her into bed with us.  She snuggled right up to me and went back to sleep.  That feeling was pretty much incredible and I will never forget it.  Addie woke up every hour or so after that and I rubbed her back and she went back to sleep.  The first couple of nights went like that, but before long, she settled into a much better sleeping routine and has slept through the night ever since.   I loved to listen to her little sounds when I went to bed at night.  Sometimes she would talk softly and sometimes just rustle around.  Knowing that those days are over is tough.  Sure, we could continue to keep her in our room for longer, but it has become clear that she is sleeping better in her room.  My early alarm clock was likely the culprit for her consistent 5:30 or 6:00am wakeup of the last months.  It wouldn't wake her up right away, but she was usually up about 20 minutes or so later. 

Another milestone happened this morning.  Addie stayed in the nursery at church for the first time.  I took her in last week and stayed with her, but this morning she went on her own and did just fine.  I'm sure it helped that her big sister was in there, too. 

As much as I want time to stand still while I try to hang on to the last remnants of Addie's "babyhood," it doesn't seem to be cooperating.  Time marches on whether I like it or not, but I plan to baby this girl as long as she will let me. 

This was taken just after we walked into our house with Addie for the first time.  She was so jet lagged and out of it!

My parents and sister and her family were anxious to meet her, so they stopped by.  You can see that Addie looks shell shocked.  And this is why big gatherings upon arrival home are not really recommended... 

Addie's way of coping?  She shut down and went to sleep. As you can tell, that was fine with me...