Redirection

verb:  to change the direction or focus of.  That's where I am.  This has been a really stinky week.  After receiving the fantastic news that baby S's birth certificate had been obtained last week, my hope was that our paperwork would then be submitted to court this week and somehow it might be possible for us to at least know of a fall court date before the courts close next Friday.  That would allow us plenty of time to make concrete arrangements for our boys, purchase airfare at a better rate, etc.  We received word last night that it isn't going to happen.  We won't know anything until October at the very earliest.  That's a tough pill to swallow and not at all the news we were hoping for this week.  My emotions have run the gamut from frustration to anger to despair and I am done.  I can't do this anymore.  Somehow what started out as a burden to be a family for a child who needs one has morphed into something I don't even recognize anymore and it is not honoring to God.  My attitude has been rotten and I am the only one that can change that.  I was filling my Mom in on the latest news last night and she encouraged me with this verse:



2nd Corinthians 10:5  We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

My thoughts have been anything BUT obedient to Christ, but I can stop them before I let them take hold.  My new plan is this:

Philippians 4:8-9 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.

I am shifting my focus away from what I am powerless to do anything about and instead placing it where there is something I can do.  Baby S is never far from my thoughts.  I believe that God has placed a deep love in my heart for her and because of that, I can't NOT think about her.  Her brothers share that love.  Last night before bed, Ethan was imploring God for a miracle so that we can bring her home soon.  Today, Jack was my helper at the pie shop.  Someone stopped in and was asking about the baby and he immediately pulled out his ipod and showed her pictures of his sister.  Someday, when we are finally able to bring that precious girl home, I know that the reunion will be so sweet.  Until then, it's going to have to be business as usual around here.